Everywhere you turn in Brown County these days water is the topic of almost every discussion, and rightfully so. But instead of talking about the plight at Lake Brownwood, which we’ve all become extremely familiar with, I’m going to spend the next few minutes talking about water of a different sort — watercooler news.
It’s been a few weeks since I’ve really invested time in perusing the tales of the bizarre, but now seems as good a time as any:
In California this past week, a roller coaster was shut down — on a temporary basis — because the riders were screaming too loudly.
The passengers on the The Gold Striker at Great America in Santa Clara shrieked so loudly the noise exceeded the decibel limit agreed upon in a settlement with a real estate firm, which owns property near the park.
A sound-dampening tunnel was placed on a portion of the track, and business resumed as usual this past Wednesday.
First off, I never understood the infatuation with yelling at the top of your lungs on a roller coaster. Then again, I was usually hanging on for dear life hoping the ride would end before my life did.
There must have been some bloodcurdling noises coming from that park to bring legal action into play. Still, to the neighboring businesses of any amusement park, use a little common sense. You didn’t move next door to a mortuary.
Speaking of mortuaries, I stumbled across an L.A. Times story from March in which the wrong woman was buried during a funeral service. Perhaps more inane is the family continued with the service.
The article went on to state that despite the family’s hesitation, they continued with the open-casket viewing and funeral, to which they had invited 150 guests. Five days later, the mortuary called the family and alerted them to the mistake.
The mix-up wasn’t realized until the boy of the woman who should have been buried was presented to another family. The “missing” woman was quickly exhumed, while the woman originally set to be interred is now in her final resting place.
The case is being investigated by California Cemetery and Funeral Bureau.
So, according to the story, the clothes were right, but the body was wrong and no one spoke up?
How does this even happen? By all indications, the woman passed from natural causes, so identification should not have been difficult.
Then to go through with the entire funeral and interment? No one thought to ask after the initial viewing if this was the right lady?
Moving on ...
You may remember a few months back I was listing all the reasons I would never move to Florida, and the great sinkhole outbreak of 2013 vaulted to the top of the list. Well, it seems sinkholes are on the move.
In Toledo, Ohio this past Wednesday, a sinkhole 10 feet in depth opened in the middle of a street and swallowed a car. The driver of the car did not suffer significant injuries and was rescued, which was not the case in Florida where a man lost his life after a sinkhole opened under his home.
The Ohio sinkhole is being blamed on a water main break, but these events are happening far too often for my liking. With all the things there are to worry about in this world these days, the ground we walk on shouldn’t fall ... um, make that be ... in that category.
For those of you who still watch The Price is Right, the infamous Plinko game is celebrating its 30th anniversary. And, for some reason unbeknownst to me, CBS felt this deserved a one-hour television special. Make sure and set your DVRs on Sept. 27 as some can’t miss TV is headed your way.
At least Bob Barker, both the white- and dark-haired versions, should be prominently featured. His replacement, Drew Carey, needs to find the weight he lost and return to the new version of “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” which begins on the CW on July 16. Some people just don’t look right skinny, or attempting to be semi-serious.
A man in Florida has collected 13,171 golf balls during the past 13 years. Apparently this guy has played behind me a lot at whatever golf course I happen to be frequenting.
My dad has a collection that may rival it, though it’s not neatly stacked and there aren’t any specific balls he’s searching for, just whatever he happens to find when he’s in the trees or OB — which is also where I like to hang out when I’m on the links.
I spent three days this past week doing nothing but playing golf. I love to play the game, I love to watch the game ... I’m just not very good at the game.
But I don’t let that slow me down. Besides, if it wasn’t for “golfers” with skill sets like mine, that guy in Florida would have never been able to even start a collection.
Derrick Stuckly is the editor of the Brownwood Bulletin. His column appears on Sundays. He may be reached by e-mail at firstname.lastname@example.org.